This is an issue that many of our clients express during their first meetings with us. Parents with wealth are concerned about leaving just enough to their children to allow the children to succeed without leaving too much so that the heirs would become “spoiled”.
When it comes to setting children up for success without making them too spoiled, parents can do a lot to install traits and virtues that promote behavior the opposite of spoiled. These virtues include generosity, thriftiness, patience, curiosity, perspective, and perseverance. How can parents promote this from birth? According to financial columnist Ron Lieber, who developed this list, parents can select balanced vacation options, reduce materialism on a daily basis, provide allowances that are not based on chores, and have clear conversations about money with children from an early age.
It’s not just about selecting the right estate planning tools, but determining what tools will work in combination with the example set forth for children. The first stage of doing this involves putting in the time and the effort to think about this fear of having spoiled children and what can be done to avoid it. The second stage is in developing clear statements about goals and values for the children. Once you have accomplished this, it’s time to put together an action plan that lays out how these goals can be achieved.
Working together with establishing goals and confronting fears, estate planning can be an empowering process that puts parents in the right perspective to think about their legacy.